Day 2 of back on track

and all is well so far! Got through yesterday with points to spare. Never quite achieved any exercise but never mind! Today I have! Just been for a walk and boy do I feel buggered now lol. On track food wise and was going to make a quiche for tea but now I've decided to finish the fish chowder I made at lunchtime. Still well within my points so unless something goes drastically wrong in the next few hours it looks like today will be another successful day. I've even managed to drink lots of water! Have still got some points remaining after dinner so there is room for supper if I want it later. Not feeling the greatest or the most positive but at least I'm on track again and hoping that the good feelings will soon follow lol. Right, off to heat up the chowder. Have a good night everyone. I think I'm just gonna have a quiet one and hope there's something worth watching on the box. TNT :-)

I'm back in the game.

Well so far, so good this morning. I have woken up still feeling positive and ready to move forwards!
Had a yummy breakfast of WW muesli and yoghurt and have planned out the day's menu with 3 points to spare.
I have drunk more water than I probably did the whole past week already and been considering what exercise I might do today and when. Ok I haven't actually done it yet but trust me, even thinking about it is a big improvement lol!
Well, here's to the beginning of me crawling my way back out of this hole and reaching -30kg and beyond!
Hope everyone is having a great day,
Cyns xoxo

Ok. I went, I put on and now I'm moving on!

A gain of 1.7 which was bad but not as bad as I expected believe it or not. I was brave enough to say out loud in the meeting that I am really struggling and somehow it really seemed to help and make me want to get back on track again. Tonight I am going to sit down and at least plan out my menu for tomorrow. One day at a time!

Well I am going to go to WW tonight

even though I really don't want to go! But I don't want to die either and when it comes down to it that's the bottom line ay and the reason I started this. I wonder how much weight it is physically possible to put on in 7 days? I guess I'll be finding out tonight! I have no idea how I'm going to get my head back in the right space but am going to the meeting and hoping like hell something will click into place. Wish me luck ...

I've lost it and I don't know where to find it!

I can't get back into the swing of things at all and instead of getting back on track Monday morning as I told myself (and you) that I would, I've gone even further off track. For the first time since I started this journey I'm at the point where I don't know how much longer I'm gonna be able to keep hanging in there and I'm scared! I just seem to have lost all motivation for everything at the moment and I'm unsure how to get it back. I think maybe I'm a bit depressed again (although I'm taking my happy pills and have been for quite some time now). I know in theory all the things I could and should be doing to make myself feel better but I just don't have the energy :-( A diet consisting of constant bad food choices, no exercise and not even drinking much water lately will NOT be helping things either I know). But, how to get off this downward merry go round and find my mojo again? That is the question. If only I could figure out the answer!

Well, last time I posted I was excited to be almost at -20kg.
Am pleased to report that that has long since gone for good and now I'm heading towards -30kg. The week before last I was only 300gms from there but after a huge unexpected gain last week I've unfortunately slid back in the other direction (temporarily I might add)!
Since last posting there's been lots going on in my life including my Dad being diagnosed with cancer which sent me into a spin for a bit. (I lost my Mum to cancer in 2000 and while Dad's is supposedly not terminal it still brought up a whole heap of stuff for me that I thought was long since dealt with). Add to that a teenage son who's been unstable and unsettled and me starting a new job - which 8 weeks in I'm really not liking all that much, life has been a little stressful at times shall we say!
Anyway, somehow, despite all this I have managed to stay reasonably focused on the whole weight loss thing and most of the time the scales have been heading in the right direction.
Since my gain last week I have gone a little (actually lots to be honest) off the rails. I wasn't expecting a gain and didn't feel it was deserved which sent me off into a spin where I just seemed to be thinking "F**K it! What's the point?" So after a terrible few days that will probably result in another (but this time oh so deserved) gain, I have decided that once again it is time to pick myself up and move on!
Starting tomorrow (I would say right now but I already have the roast pork with crackling in the oven for dinner and god damn I'm gonna enjoy it)! So tomorrow morning from the moment my eyes are open the new and improved attitude is in place and all systems are go again!
My initial goal was 150kg which at the start was 39.7 kg away. It's now only 11.2 (if my maths is right) anyway it's looking like a definitely do-able thing. Add another 300g to that and I'll have lost 40kg and I WILL be there by my 40th which is in July.
Look out world here I come!
Ok well I wont bore you all to tears and will leave it there as I head off to do some much overdue housework.
Take care everyone. TNT,
Cyndi xoxo

I'm back!!!

Just bought a new computer and yay I can get into my blog again!!! Something must have been disabled on my old computer (I'm blaming the teen)! Woo hoo way cool! Okay no time to write lots now - lots of playing with new toy to be done lol BUT I will update soon and regularly I promise!